she's
actual
size

I still want to do things for her, but I don't know what else I can do without being too intrusive.

She's taken him to court for assault and harassment charges. He got a suspended jail sentence and a fine, a no contact order, and if any similar charges are filed against him by anyone he's screwed. She wanted him to pay, but it's better this way. See, if he goes to jail and does his time, when he comes out the slate is (basically) clean. And he'll be mad. But now... If he screws up, bad things will happen to him. He needs to be on his best behavior.

In the meantime, she took up with another asshole. They broke up last night. She was in tears.

Please please please don't start the cycle again.

She's beautiful. She's intelligent. She's self-reliant. Why can't she see what she's doing to herself?

Tonight I took her a game that I'd been meaning to give her for a while. It was mostly an excuse to spend some time with her... I honestly don't know what else I can do for her except be there. I try to make myself available for when she wants to talk. I try to let her know that I'm willing to listen.

... but an acquaintance can only do so much. I've tried explaining to her that I was in her shoes once. I felt alone and unloved and was desperate to find someone. And then I found Dave.

"I'll never find anyone," she says.

"I found someone," I counter.

"You're not me."

sigh On and on... She sees herself only one way, and refuses to open her eyes so that she can really see how wonderful she is.

She needs to let up on the restrictions for who she will go out with... And tighten up other restrictions that are way too loose. Don't date anyone who treats you like shit. Don't specify height, weight and hair color for a prospective mate - the "pretty boys" tend to be assholes, because they're handsome and they know it. Do set ground rules - if you're stood up by someone three times in a row, it means they don't care.

Please find someone who will treat you right. You deserve it. Don't just settle for anyone.

And so I stand on the sidelines, ready to run in whenever she falls. I just wish I could figure out a way to prevent her from tripping. I'm tired of seeing her get hurt.