02 21 00

aftermath

I said goodbye to Dave less than ten hours ago, and already it feels like I haven't seen him in months.

There was a tiny little jolt of unreality today when I slid the ring on my finger. It felt as though I was just play-acting, that this was a dream and I would wake up and the play would be over and everything would be as it was before. But I know that it's real.

It still hasn't all sunk in yet.

I fared a little better than normal during our goodbye this morning. My parents drove Dave to the airport because I needed to go to work. I got all teary-eyed again, and watched them drive off. It felt like someone had reached deep down within my body and ripped out a chunk of me.

But I had to go to work, and I stayed busy the whole day. I think that was for the best. The other times Dave and I have parted I've had the rest of the day off to mope and be sad and feel alone. Jumping right back into work helped a lot.

Of course, the shiny little item on my left ring finger caught a bit of attention.

As soon as I walked in, clocked in and sat down, the Maintenance Manger rolled his chair over to mine and grabbed my hand. He examined the ring and nodded. "That's what I thought," he whispered, giving me a thumbs-up.

In sort order the rest of the office knew about the engagement, and I spent a good part of the day waving my hand around. "Come on, let's see it!" wave "Oooh, let me see!" wave

Of course, the most frequently asked question was "Have you set a date yet?" Does this happen to everyone? I mean, we just did this yesterday. It's not like we immediately sat down and started mapping out a timetable.

"Will you marry me?"
"Sure. I can pencil you in for 2pm March 4th next year."
"Hmm. I think I have a dentist appointment that day. Can we go with the 16th of March instead?"
"Well, I'll have to move my meeting with the stockbroker but I think that'll work."

Whatever.

The second most asked question was "Where will you live?" The answer, of course, was Canada. It makes sense, but it scares me all the same. I've lived in this town my entire life. It's familiar, it's comfortable, it's a known quantity. Canada is far away, unfamiliar and scary. This idea is going to take a lot of getting used to.

I'd left a message for Min to call me, and she returned my call while I was at work. She asked, "So what did you want?"

"Dave left this morning."

"Uh huh."

"He gave me a ring."

"He - What?! Did you say yes?"

"Yes."

"DUDE! DUDE! DUDE!"

(Min can be a bit loud (not to mention odd) sometimes.)

I held the phone away from my ear for a few minutes until she calmed down. She asked for a description of the ring, and I told her. She coming over later this week to "visit the ring... Oh, you too."

Ahh, sisters. Always interested in the important things.

After I got home I called my best friend, Sammy. And she kept talking about dresses and stuff.

Dresses??

Good grief. I keep thinking, "What have I gotten myself into?" And I sit and look at the ring on my finger and feel... calm. At peace. It's right. I love him.

I do.

Look Out

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